I might be judging a little harshly, since I’m only on day three of these antidepressants, but taking the tablet each day is starting to feel like I’m poisoning myself slowly. My body and mind seem to hate them. I feel drugged. For a few hours after I take them I feel horribly dizzy whenever I stand up. I’m permanently filled with a kind of nervous energy, but feel exhausted at the same time. My concentration is shot and my memory seems to be taking a few hits too. My digestive system doesn’t seem to enjoy them too much either.
I want to die, but right now, on these pills, I don’t think I could begin to put a coherent plan together. Even overdosing on the pills isn’t going to do too much, beyond making me miserable for a few days. So, despite the occasional urge, I’m not going to do that. This whole let’s-get-medical-help thing is turning out to be a whole lot more effort than I thought.